Falling in Hate with You
by wikster
Summary: You're done. You're finished fighting. If she doesn't care, if she wants to be the end of you and just kill you right here and now, you'll let her. You can't keep living like this much longer anyway. This hatred has consumed you. You're gone already…


**Hi! So, this here's my first fic ever on this site... I've had it written for like 2 and a half months and i decided to finally publish it... :) It takes place during the "Car, Rain, and Fire" episode. **

**Disclaimer: I should say that VicTORIous ****_does _****belong to me so that I could get sued by Nickelodeon and take advantage of seeing Dan in the courtroom to try and convince him to make Jori happen... but knowing my luck, I'd probably just get deported U_U so no, I don't own anything.**

**Anywho, hope you guys like it! :D**

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"Great. This is just fucking great." You growl as steam spills out from the hood and the car begins to jerk.

"Oh no… What's happening?" Tori cries out from the passenger seat, setting down the cage with the hamster and robot that makes up her and Cat's science project.

"What does it look like, Vega?" you spit as you begin to pull over. "This piece of shit car decided that it wasn't enough to let us get soaked by its lack of top, but now must also leave us stranded in the middle of fucking nowhere."

The steam engulfed the car once it came to a complete stop and died by the side of the road.

"It looks like we're driving in a cloud! Hehe." You hear Cat exclaim from the back seat, raising her hands in the air. You roll your eyes and set the car on park, while Tori looks around frantically at the surroundings.

"Uh… I don't know if we should stop here, Jade." Tori tells you in a frightened voice.

After leaving the supposed dead actress's house in San Diego, Cat had said that according to her PearPad there was an accident on the freeway you needed to take back home. Not knowing if you'd be able to stand the pair of girls much longer, you decided to take some of the back roads that run parallel to the freeway and avoid the traffic jam. Tori had advised you against it saying it was too late and dangerous to be traveling on strange roads, only to quickly shut her mouth when you threatened to make a pair of mittens with their fat hamster's fur if she didn't.

"Well, princess, unless you plan on pushing the car all the way home I'd say we have no other option." You shoot back while still struggling to untie the rope that functioned as a seat belt from above your left shoulder. "Argh! Why did your stupid brother use this stupid rope for a stupid seat belt?! It won't come off!"

"I told you, he loves rope." Cat chirps jumping out from the backseat and begins running back and forth through the cloud of steam that had formed, giggling incessantly.

"Here, let me help you." Tori reaches across you for the rope. You turn forward only to be met with her face three inches from your own.

"What the fuck, Vega!" you bark and push her back against the steering wheel making her accidentally honk the horn with her arm. Somewhere hidden within the cloud of steam you hear a certain redhead giggle and make honking noises herself.

"Ow! Jade! I'm trying to help you!" Tori cries rubbing her elbow. You glare at her and go back to trying to pull on the rope yourself, but seeing as your movements are limited by it, you're unable to get it loose. Giving one last exasperated growl, you sink back into the seat and look away.

Tori, never one to give up, tentatively reaches across for the rope and this time isn't pushed away. She struggles a bit with the tight knot and has to hoist herself up a bit closer to you to get better access. Feeling her body heat radiating onto your own, you hesitantly turn your face forward and are met again with Tori's only a short distance away. You begin feeling sick at the close proximity you find yourself to her. Nauseated by the smell of her perfume, shampoo and the earthy scent of rain all mixed together. You glare at her intently, your nostrils flaring as your breathing comes out long and deep. The brunette works nervously on untying the knot, all the while throwing a couple of uneasy glances at you herself. Finally the rope gives and comes undone.

"There. All done." Tori exclaims with an apprehensive smile as she meets your gaze, brown eyes staring intently into your green ones.

"Great. Now you can get the fuck off me, Vega." You grumble through gritted teeth. Her eyes widen as she realizes she's basically sitting on your lap. In a second she jumps off and scurries onto her seat. You throw the rope away from you and climb out of the car, Tori following suit.

Looking around, you see nothing but the vast landscape of the desert that separates you from the highway a couple of miles west from the road. On the other side of said road, maybe like 200 yards away, stands an old abandoned gas station. Apart from that there is absolutely no sign of civilization. You reach into your jean's pocket and pull out your phone.

"And of course there's no signal." You deadpan.

"Yea I got nothing either." Tori adds as she walks around holding her cell phone in the air as if that will improve its reception. "Cat," she calls. "does your phone have signal?" There's no response. You turn towards the front of the car and see Cat engulfed by the steam cloud, taking bites in the air and giggling as she tries to consume the thick vapor. "Cat! Where's your phone?" Tori tries again.

"Don't even bother." You grumble as you spot Cat's purse in the back seat, water dripping from every pocket. Her cell phone can be seen floating face down on the surface; next to a lipstick, banana and a purple stuffed giraffe. Tori lets out a frustrated groan when she sees it.

"Oh man… what're we gonna do?" she whines hugging herself tightly. You feel that nauseating knot in your stomach tighten as you watch her. Damp brown locks plastered on her face and her skin glistening under the moonlight even though it stopped raining over an hour ago. Her pink sweater and jeans clinging to her body as the water weighs them down. You drag your eyes back to her face and see her staring back at you. You also notice the slight shiver that runs through her body and she hugs herself tighter.

A cold drop of water suddenly meets your warm cheek making you wince. You wipe it away with the back of your hand and stick your palm out in front of you only for it to quickly be pelted by more drops.

"And of course it's raining again." You groan.

"Maybe we can push the car to the gas station." Tori says, pointing towards the abandoned building. "It has a roof that'll at least keep us dry until we can think of something. Maybe there's a payphone in the store."

"Cat!" you yell. The redhead is currently jumping in puddles and giggling like a child. "Cat get your ass over here!" Her head snaps up towards you and she begins to skip over.

"Here's my ass! Hehe!" she sings as she turns away from you and shakes her behind. The rain starts coming down harder and you're becoming more irritated.

"Cat…" you growl low and dangerous. "I swear to God if you don't stop fucking around I'm gonna-"

"Ok, Cat!" Tori interrupts sensing your tone. "We're gonna push the car over to that gas station." She points to the darkened structure. "We need you to get in the driver's seat, put the car in neutral and maneuver it towards the pumps while Jade and I push, ok?" The rain is coming down in torrents now and her face is completely drenched as she looks at you. You simply give her a brief nod and move towards the back of the car while Cat gets in place.

"Ok, are you ready?" Tori asks when the both of you stand behind the car, hands on the trunk.

"Less talking, more pushing, Vega." You snap and begin to push the vehicle. At first it won't budge and you fear it's too heavy for the both of you to push all by yourselves. "Son of a bitch this rolling chiz box is heavy!" You grunt as your shoes scrape the pavement. You hear Tori grunting next to you as she too pushes with all her might. Eventually, the wheels begin to turn and the slight downhill into the gas station's driveway gives it the momentum it needs to get going.

"_Weee_!" You look up and see Cat holding her hands up as though she were on a roller-coaster.

"Cat! Keep your hands on the damn steering wheel!" You scream, but she doesn't seem to hear you over the rain and the car slowly starts to turn away from the station. "Goddammit!" The car is moving fast enough to prevent you from running up to Cat, and you can't afford to stop pushing and lose the momentum you have going. You look around for something to catch the redhead's attention and your sight lands on the girl pushing next to you. "Vega, give me your boot."

"What- No! Why?!"

"Vega, just give me your fucking boot!" You demand. She lets out an exasperated sigh and stumbles a bit as she removes her boot while still moving forward. You take it and throw it at the oblivious girl in the driver's seat. It misses her head by centimeters and lands on the dashboard in front of her. Startled, she grabs it, examining it in her hand before turning her gaze up towards the sky, shielding her eyes from the rain with her free hand.

"Guys…" she calls while still searching the heavens. "This rain is getting weird!"

A loud growl echoes through the vast emptiness before a matching boot hits the back of her head and she finally turns to you, a hand rubbing the spot where it hit and a huge pout on her face.

"Hands. On. _The wheel_!" you grumble through gritted teeth. Her eyes widen in fear and she immediately steers the car in the right direction. Finally you reach the station and as soon as the car is covered from the rain by the roof over the pumps, Cat slams on the breaks, making you and Tori slam into the car.

"Ow!" You both cry out as you fall backwards onto the floor.

"Sorry!" Cat giggles as she bounces out of the car.

You remain on the ground for a few seconds trying to catch your breath. Looking up you see Vega standing next to you, holding her hand out. You stare at her outstretched hand and slowly move your eyes to the rest of her. She's completely soaked; water dripping from her hair, clothes, and face. Her socks are covered in mud and grass and still she stands there, smiling down and offering you a hand. The nasty feeling in your stomach returns and your skin feels hot and clammy. You're certain you would throw up if only you had any food in your system. But you haven't eaten much these days. Not when your stomach keeps turning upside down every second like it is now. Your eyes lock with hers, anger bubbling up within you. With a grunt you push yourself up on your feet and bump into her as you walk by. You hear her let out an exasperated sigh, but you don't bother turning around.

"I'm going to go check out the store." You announce while you walk toward the dark abandoned building. "You two keep an eye out for any cars that may drive by and flag them down." You jog the short distance between the pump station and the store that isn't covered by a roof. Not like it makes much of a difference. You feel disgusting, not only because you're soaking wet and cold all over but because of the nagging feeling in your stomach. When you reach the store entrance, you see that the door has been boarded up but there's a wide enough gap between the wooden planks for you to squeeze through. Your eyes take a few seconds to adjust to the darkness, the only light being the one from the moon coming in through the windows. The floor and shelves are littered with trash, broken chairs lay on the floor and the main counter is covered in dirt. There's no phone anywhere. Frustrated, you kick an empty beer bottle on the floor and it crashes into bits and pieces against the wall. You run your cold hands through your hair and lean weakly against a wall, slowly letting yourself slide down until you're seated on the floor.

"Fuck…" you whisper softly, lifting your knees up to your chest and resting your head on them.

"Jade?" Your head jerks up at the sound of her voice. You can make out her silhouette crouching in through the opening at the door.

"Fuck." You groan, banging your head back against the wall. She spots you on the ground and makes her way towards you.

"Hey, so um, I finally managed to get reception on my phone…" she says wiggling her phone in her hand. "I called my parents and told them where we were and what happened. They said they'll call AAA and within an hour or so, they, along with a tow-truck, should be here to pick us up." When you don't say anything she steps closer. Her face is obscured by the shadows but you know it's filled with concern. Your stomach tightens.

"Jade?" she asks getting closer. "You ok?" You scoff but otherwise remain quiet. She's standing right next to you now. Even from your sitting position on the ground you can smell her. Feel her.

You're going to be sick.

"Jade," her voice is soft and quiet. Like she's afraid to be too loud and risk upsetting you. "What's the matter? What's wrong?" You see her reach out to you tentatively. Her hand is an inch from yours and yet you can feel its warmth, sending hot waves all throughout your body. You jerk your hand away before she can even touch it and quickly push yourself off of the floor. You walk clear across the room so that now you're standing as far away from her as possible. "Jade!" she cries out, anger and frustration evident in her voice. "What the hell's your problem?"

And that's when you snap. Everything that has been bubbling up within suddenly boils over and begins spilling out of you, and you can't do anything but let it.

"What's my problem?! _My _problem?!" You explode, pointing an accusing finger at her. "No, Vega. No! What the hell is _your_ problem? Why the fuck won't you just_. Leave. Me. ALONE!_" Now facing the window, her face is illuminated by the moonlight, and you can see shock take over her features, leaving her speechless. "What will it take for you to finally get a fucking clue and _leave me alone_?" you cry throwing your hands in the air.

"I-I –" she stutters.

"You would think that after all these years you'd finally give up! That you'd finally realize that we are _not _friends! That _I don't like you! _That I _never _liked you! That I never _will_ like you! That as a matter of fact, I fucking _hate _you!" you hiss with as much venom as you possibly can. You see her flinch and that just fuels you more. "Yes, that's right, I _hate _you! I hate _everything_ about you! I don't think I've ever hated anyone or anything as much as I hate you! And that's a lot coming from me…" you add with a bitter laugh. You turn away from her and begin pacing in the room. Too much emotion running through you to stand still. You look back at her to see her reaction but she simply stands there, frozen solid.

"You make me sick." You sneer. "You literally make me _sick. _Every time you look at me, every time you smile that stupid ass smile, every time you come into the _fucking _room! My stomach churns and I feel like throwing up. I haven't been able to eat right in weeks, Vega! Weeks!

"You aggravate me so goddamn much! The moment you come near me, my heart gets all riled up and I can't seem to control my breath. My chest tightens and it takes everything in me to regain control of myself so I don't pass out on the fucking floor! How can a single person incite so much hate in someone?" You ask more to yourself than to her.

"Every day it gets worse and worse. I can't stand having you near me anymore. Whenever you touch me it feels like my skin burns as soon as it makes contact with yours. The sound of your voice sends me into cardiac arrest! Your smell, oh that fucking smell! It makes my head spin. The way you are frustrates me to no end! It's like someone shoved the sun up your ass and you just go around barfing up happiness and rainbows! And it makes me crazy!" You scream at the top of your lungs, ending your pacing.

You're standing with your back towards her now. Your breathing is hard and jagged after the release of everything that's been eating you up for so long. You place your hands on the counter in front of you and hang your head, eyes shut tight. "_You _make me crazy…" you mutter.

Neither of you speak for several minutes. The only noise being the rain pouring mercilessly outside.

You feel drained. You feel weak and lost. You thought that when you told her this, the pressure in your chest would let up. But it seems as though the exact opposite happened, just adding to your frustration.

"God, I hate you." You whimper as you collapse on the floor. "I fucking hate you."

Finally, after what seems like an eternity, you hear shuffling on the other side of the room. Slow, steady steps make their way over to you. But you're too weak to turn around, to face her. She seems to know this, because she kneels down by you and suddenly you feel a warm hand on your cheek, turning you towards her. Just as you said, her touch burns through your skin. You shut your eyes tight but don't push her away. You're done. You're finished fighting. If she doesn't give a shit, if she wants to be the end of you and just kill you right here and now, you'll let her. You can't keep living like this much longer anyway. This hatred has consumed you. You're gone already…

Suddenly, you're anything but dead. Hot lips burning against yours shoot what seems like torrents of electricity into your body, jolting it back to life. Your eyes snap open and you try to pull back but her other hand wraps around your neck holding you in place, her lips never ceasing their attack on yours. Your own hands frantically search for something to hang on to, ending up bunched in the fabric of her sweater by the neck. But instead of pushing her away, your hands pull her to you, so that she's pressed even tighter against you. You hear her moan into your mouth as your bodies touch and the sound makes your eyes flutter shut. Before you understand what's happening, your lips start fervently kissing back. She shifts around and ends up straddling your lap, pushing your back against the counter wall as she deepens the kiss. Your hands release the death grip on her sweater and round their way to her back, where you once more bring her closer. It's as though your body and mind are on different planes, completely contradicting one another. Your mind screaming how wrong and twisted this is, while your body cries out for your mind to shut the fuck up and kiss her harder! And who are you to argue with that logic? You let your body take over, after all, it seems to know something your mind doesn't or is being too damn stubborn to admit.

Suddenly teeth capture your bottom lip and pull, eliciting a deep moan from your throat, which in turn causes one of your knees to jerk up, pressing between Tori's legs. She gasps at this, separating your lips for the first time as she presses her face into the nook between your neck and shoulder. You use this opportunity to catch a much needed breath, only for it to be stolen from you just as quickly by hot lips on your neck. Now it's your turn to gasp as a hot tongue trails its way to your ear, nipping it softly. All you can do is press her body closer as your hips instinctively jerk up.

Tired of the limited position you find yourself in, you grab her by the hips and with a growl push her down on her back, quickly climbing over on top of her. Her hands tangle themselves in your hair as she pulls you in for another desperate kiss. Your right leg settles between both of hers while your left keeps you from placing all your weight on her. A hand cups the side of her face while the other one starts ascending over the fabric of her sweater from her hip to the bottom of her breast. When you rub your thumb over the swell of her covered breast, she opens her mouth in a breathy moan and you take advantage of this and deepen the kiss by allowing your tongue to explore. You both moan as your tongues meet for the first time. You don't know how much time passes of you exploring each other's mouth, but you get the sudden need to taste more of her, as you can't seem to get enough. All of the feelings brewing in you these past couple of months finally erupt into this massive ball of lust and desire. You _needed _to be near her. You _needed _her to look at you. You _needed _her smell, her touch. You needed _her. _God, how could you have been so fucking stupid?

These revelations only fuel you further. You break your mouth away from hers only to quickly attach it to the side of her jaw, relishing in her taste. You make your way down to her neck, and after nipping, sucking and licking everywhere your mouth manages to find skin, you venture further south to her collar bone. Her chest is heaving vigorously and her eyes are closed as she drowns in the feelings you're causing in her. Seeing her in this state makes your entire body burn up. You become lost in her, savoring the feel of her.

You move your leg upward, so that your knee presses firmly into her, adding pressure to her very sensitive area, all while you continue the assault with your mouth on her collarbone.

"J-Jade…" She lets out a low breathy moan at the contact and you almost loose it at the sound. There's so much need in her voice, so much passion. She desperately clings to you, almost as if she fears you will disappear the moment she lets go. And that's when it hits you, that she wants you just as badly as you want her. You can feel it; the raw need and desire radiating from every inch of her.

All these months you spent in frustration, anger, and denial didn't just take a toll on you. She suffered just as much if not more. While you veered your feelings into those of hate and repulsion, she had to endure your hostility while restraining her own yearning. All pent up longing and desire finally being released along with yours.

"Shit…" you breathe out, detaching yourself from her. You push off slightly so that you're still hovering over her body but can look into her face. Her eyes open once she notices the lack of your body heat. Frightened brown eyes meet yours and your stomach lurches again, this time with guilt. You see how much you've hurt her. How insecure you make her deep beneath her usual confident self. All the hate you were forcing yourself to emanate left her scared and unsure. You can sense the fear in her eyes; fear that you'll take away all you've given and leave her with nothing but affliction again.

You are both breathing heavily, hearts beating hard and loud within your chests. Rain falls and thunder shakes the entire building. And yet, as you stare into her eyes, everything around you vanishes; the car, the storm, the sticky feeling of your wet and dirty clothes. Gone. It's just you and her. It's always been just you and her.

_No, _you tell yourself. _It's always been _her.

You cautiously bring your hand to her face, lightly brushing some stray hair from it with the back of your fingers. Gently, you caress them down to her cheek, running your thumb slightly over the edge of her mouth. Her eyes flutter shut as she lets out a slow broken breath, and you wonder if it's in relief that you're not running away, or due to the effect your touch has on her. When her eyes blink open, you see that it was a little bit of both, as they're once again filled with longing.

"Tori…" You whisper. It sounds like a declaration, and feels like liberation. As though through the mere mention of her name you suddenly became free from your bindings. From the bullshit you'd been putting yourself through. For the pain you submitted _her_ to. The weight is finally being lifted through that simple action of you surrendering to her and what she makes you feel.

"I-I'm-" the words overwhelm you, filling up your head and your heart with different emotions that only she can stir in you. And you want to tell her, you want to explain them all to her. But nothing forms in your mouth. Nothing comes out and you begin to panic, fearing that she won't see that you understand now. That everything is clear.

But she doesn't question or wait for you to say anything. She reaches up and cups your face in her hands, smiling in a way that makes your chest and stomach implode within you, causing havoc in your insides.

"I know…" She whispers, pulling your face closer to her; hot breath brushing your lips. "I hate you too." And she gives you the softest of kisses. Slow and gentle but not any less passionate than the ones shared just a few minutes before. Your lips caress one another tenderly. Through them you speak everything that words couldn't manage.

You press your forehead to hers, turning slightly to caress her face with your own. Her hands delicately rake through your hair. And you realize that you could stay like this forever. That if for some reason your life suddenly got stuck on a continual loop, you'd be perfectly happy for it to stay on these past few minutes with her.

You realize why your mind so fervently misinterpreted and denied what your body so clearly perceived and desired. All throughout the struggle you'd forgotten to listen to the one part of you that held the answer: Your heart. The same heart that now beats strongly for her, willing her to see that this is much more than lust, much more than simple physical attraction. And it is most definitely, not hate.

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**AN: I originally had written it with the intent of making it a two-shot. Maybe the second part being with Tori's point of view? But I don't know... Tell me what you guys think! :) Hope you enjoyed it! **


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